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How I swallowed my nose
Pros:
The appearance was improved.
My nose is natural looking.
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Cons:
It didn't change my life or my feelings about my appearance.
I was disfigured for 2 months post-op.
It was a gruesome operation.
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Cost:
$1500
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Healing time:
1 year
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Pain-o-meter: 2
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People are very surprised when I tell them that I had a nose job. I suppose it is because my nose is far from the expected. Most jobs look like they came out of a catalogue. I can picture people ordering a number 3 and ending up with a perfect little up-turned nose.
My nose is nothing like a perfect up-turn. In fact, it is still rather big and crooked. I am not dissatisfied with it but I am also not overly impressed either. My greatest consolation is perhaps that it looks so natural.
It has almost been ten years now and I tend to forget that I ever had it done. If I were asked whether it was worth it or if I would go through with it again, I would answer yes, but with some hesitation and one fairly significant caveat: this time I would want to be prepared. I only wish I had known what it entailed beforehand.
It was probably among the most traumatic experiences of my life and although I do not regret it, I would not suggest it to the faint at heart.
It all started with my general displeasure concerning my appearance. I hated and still hate the way I look. Although the nose is an improvement, it is by no means a panacea to my general dissatisfaction with my appearance and my resulting low self-esteem. That having been said, being a true WASP, I would never have pursued it on my own.
To my great surprise, it was my mother who decided that it was necessary. She was good friends with a well-respected plastic surgeon and had treated herself to an eye-lift a few years beforehand. As she was so pleased with her new eyelids, she thought it appropriate to tackle my nose next.
The initial appointment involved the doctor getting very excited about all the alterations my nose would need. I, of course, had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. He took a Polaroid of me and declined to show me any before and after shots so that I could either chose the model I wanted or have some idea of how it might turn out. We scheduled the surgery and that was it until I literally went under the knife.
I arrived at the hospital only to discover that I would not be offered any drugs. Somewhat disappointed, I consoled myself with the fact that I had taken the precaution of bringing earplugs so that I would not have to hear the sound of my nose being broken. The doctor told me that they would make no difference and when I asked if I could have my eyes covered, I was told that anything around my eyes would get in the way of the surgery.
So, there I was on the table with my heart pounding and my eyes tightly shut. This was not at all what I had expected. No Valium to calm me down; nothing to soothe or comfort me. All I got was a dozen shots of local anesthetic to my nose. I was terrified.
I did have the luxury, however, of holding the nurse's hand and squeezing it when the procedure began. I had not really been prepared for all the noise. I could hear the scalpel slicing, scissors snipping, something like a large cheese grater filing down the cartilage as well as the hammer and chisel smashing the surrounding bone. It was pretty gruesome considering that I was completely "compus mentus".
The worst part, however, was that I had to swallow all of the blood and discarded scraps of my nose. There was no suction and I was in a prone position so I really had no choice. Towards the end, however, I began to choke on it and had to sit up to ensure that it all went down.
Once over, I began to notice that I was having trouble seeing. I thought it was the nose cast but the surgeon informed me that I had already begun to swell. I was told to take Ibuprofen for the pain and was promptly sent home. My parents then left me at home and drove to the country for the weekend. If I needed anything, my sister was just a phone call away.
The next morning, I got the shock of my life. I looked in the mirror only to find Frankenstein staring back at me. I could not understand how it could be possible to have such a swollen face without it actually bursting. What happened to the promise that I could resume my normal life after a day or so provided I was not too put off by the bruising. I panicked, called my sister and burst into tears. She assured me that I was overreacting and that she would be right over to survey the supposed damage.
She nearly fainted when I answered the door. It was not as bad as I had let on, in fact, it was much worse. If you have ever seen the movie "Mask", I looked a lot like the main character, no exaggeration. The surgeon was called and reassured me that it was just a nasty reaction to the anesthetic which he had anticipated. Unfortunately, he had not bothered to share this information with me the day before.
On a more positive note, however, I never felt the slightest pain.
A month later, when the amber-like scabs were finally out of my nostrils, I was actually able to go outside. That's right - one month later the swelling had gone down enough that I could walk around without fear of being stared at. I think my family was so relieved to see my face return to normal that they hardly noticed the difference between my old nose and the new one. Perhaps it was a little thinner and straighter but there was no dramatic change.
About eight months later, I saw the surgeon at a New Year’s party and he told me to come in and have the bottom of my nose fixed. Apparently, he felt it needed shortening. A year after the first surgery, I was back on the table. This time, I knew what to expect, except for the five students who had been invited to watch.
Two years later, while out for a sail, my mother informed me that the swelling was finally down and that it had been a success.
Looking back, it was an experience I hope never to repeat. I say this as I prepare myself to have my two feet broken to correct my terrible bunions. I suppose I have never been afraid of surgery and all that goes with it. It must be my strong stomach and my desire to change something about myself.
At any rate, I just had pictures taken at a studio and was quite disturbed to see what my nose looked like in the proofs. I looked like a hockey player. Somehow, the “professional” photographer managed to catch my nose at the one truly unflattering angle where it looks like I have been in too many fistfights on the ice.
Oh well, as I mentioned before, if you have issues with your appearance, surgery is not the answer. You may feel better about the way you look for a while but soon enough something else will suddenly overpower whatever improvement the surgery might have made.
I am glad I had my nose done and often forget what I went through as well as the initial happiness I felt regarding my new nose. I am still just as obsessed and unhappy with my looks as I ever was, however.
One thing I have learned is that you have to change the way you think in order for a change in the way you look to make a lasting difference.
Here are more details:
How results differed from what I expected:
I expected a cute, perfect nose and it is still a bit crooked and not as small as I would like.
Biggest fears pre-procedure:
I was afraid of the operation itself but not the results.
Healing aids used:
No, I wish I had!
Number of doctors consulted:
1
Number of years I thought about having the procedure:
since adolescence
Had an elective procedure before:
No
Complications or follow-up procedures:
I had a reaction to the anasthetic, terrible swelling and a very long recovery.
I had a follow-up procedure to shorten the area between my nostrils (1 year later).
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This information is not to substitute for professional medical advice. You
should not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem or
disease without consulting with a qualified healthcare provider. Please
consult your healthcare provider with any questions or concerns you may have
regarding your condition.
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Gender:
Female
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Age:
30
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Ethnic group:
Caucasian
Education:
Post-graduate degree
Country:
Canada
State/Province:
Quebec
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About 70 percent of obese girls remain obese as adult women.
(Source: the Role of Weight Management in the Health of Women" by Sachiko T. St. Jeor, professor and director of Nutrition Education and Research at the University of Nevada, School of Medicine)
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